Ruby, an unlicensed massage therapist, has a nasty habit of killing her clients in the most horrific ways. Using the blood of her victims, Ruby attempts to resurrect the deranged spirit of her long-dead lover. But will her newly-hired hooker ""employee"" throw a wrench (or more) into the mix? You'll have to find out in ""MASSAGE PARLOR OF DEATH""... where there are NO HAPPY ENDINGS!
T**Y
BRING OUT THE SACRED BUBBLE MAKER
This is a film that may be in the category "so bad it is good" but may have slipped into the "so bad it is really bad" stage. Ruby (Michelle Kaveet) uses the guise of a massage parlor to collect blood and body parts to resurrect her lover. A prostitute (Christina Martine) aids and abets her in the process.The film had an estimated $50 budget, but I would guess they spent more than that on fake body parts unless they used a discarded mannequin. The stabbing scenes were done very slowly and there was no penetration, just fake blood. In one scene where Ruby is obtaining "the book" both her and the native were laughing as they struggled, unable to keep a straight face during the shooting. In the bed scene, the camera man's shadow gets into the picture. Kudos Richard Mogg (writer, director, camera man etc.) for keeping the microphone out of the picture, although you should have considered putting it in...it wouldn't have hurt the film and in fact may have improved. it.Yes, I had to laugh at it.No f-bombs or nudity. Simulated clothed sex. Very fake body parts and even fake looking blood.
C**N
Less garbage more good movies dam this trash lol
we bit cheesy an tade borring but i made to the end so ya 3 sounds right lol soooo much garbage on amazon hard to find a good movie. maybe 3 bit high for this cheese but what hell. dame it amazon you need more good movie less garbage js.
M**Y
I Watched This Vancouver Garbage So You Don't Have To
I guarantee I spent more money buying this movie than the producers did making it. After I bought this copy they were in the black. There's an art to making bad movies. There are also rules. Rule 1. Don't give me a massive headache trying to watch it. Underwhelming boring and an absolutely pathetic soundtrack that made my ears bleed for real. Unlike this ketchup show. It's trying to be funny and pay homage to the shot on video (SOV) bad 80's slasher glory days. But it belly flops on its face. I love camp but this movie makes me want to stay home and skip it for the summer. So frustrating. All the crappy kills are the exact same and she even breaks the third wall on one random occasion. Stop making movies if there this bad or I promise I'll start trying to stop buying them. No entertainment value here at all and payoff was a big huge Milk Dud after getting this one home. With a title like MPOD it's impossible not to execute cheese properly but Richard Mogg blew it and should be sued for false advertising. All tease and no sleaze and just no good and no fun.
C**R
Perfect "bad movie"
I was in the mood to watch a bad movie and this was exactly what I was looking for. There are people who "say" they like no-budget, talentless movies... but be warned, this film is only for those who can truly tolerate the worst.Massage Parlor of Death is supposed to look like a low budget 80s film, and the horrible sound quality only adds to the feel. There are horrible screeching noises between certain scenes that really aggrevated my cat. The movie itself had a plot, to my surprise. It's exactly what you would expect, killings take place in an illegal massage parlor, situated in someone's apartment (which I'm pretty sure was someone's real life apartment). The props were hilarious, the "massage table" seemed to be some sort of cot with a curtain on it. The curtain was never changed or cleaned so each time someone was killed, they had to lay down on an already blood soaked table... very realistic. The main girl, at one point, drags a bag of body parts to the trash, but it sounds like hollow plastic. She then proceeds to take out each body part, one by one, and put them in a garbage can. They look like discount Halloween props,which was a nice touch. There's also incredibly cheesy scenes with some weird voodoo guy and lots of superficial stabbings and Karo syrup. The stabbing scenes are beautiful; the knife is either real or made of hard plastic and the actress was very cautious with it, to the point that it obviously never touched the victim; very unintentionally slow stabbings.There are strange shots during times that I *think* are supposed to be artistic. A shot of a bird taking a dump. A bee crawling. An automatic side-load garbage truck collecting trash... It was very curious.Also, since many crappy movies like this depend on nudity, I wanted to point out that there is none. There's implied sex scenes but if you intend to watch this solely because you think it looks sleazy or hot, you'll be greatly disappointed.Buy this movie if you want to see strange acting, an unpredictable plot, and watch a movie unlike anything you've seen before. I definitely will be watching this one again.
B**4
Massage Parlor of Bordem is more like it
You know it’s going to be low budget but even then it’s still not very entertaining for a 60 minute movie. There was one funny bit involving a stick otherwise kinda boring. Skip this one. Too many other free prime movies
D**D
The greatest movie ever!
This is the greatest movie ever! Made for $50! See if you can do better for $50! Watch it!
D**S
Not good
I like the director , but this stinks. Who gets massages with their clothes on ?
P**R
Worse than you can imagine!
really suk'ed. did not get to 10 minutes!
D**D
One Star
Worst movie Ive seen , not even a movie but just a few scenes
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