The Narcissistic Parent: A Guidebook for Legal Professionals Working with Families in High-Conflict Divorce

This book angered me. The behavior the author attributes to the narcissistic parent is spot-on, but in situations of domestic abuse, the victim is often portrayed by legal professionals as the narcissistic parent because the professionals have read this book which does not at all address the similar behaviors victims exhibit that are results of being narcissistically abused. His claim that children always side with the narcissistic parent is absolutely untrue, yet family courts are trained to believe children align with the abuser, leading to horrific custodial orders that further child abuse and penalize the victims. Protective parents, almost always mothers, are treated by courts as "alienating" parents, when in fact they are brave victims of domestic abuse who have made the very difficult and frightening decision to stand up to the abusive parent in order to save their abused children. Abused children are more likely to be awarded to the abusive parent in our family courts while the good/protective parent is often removed from their child's life. "High conflict" divorces almost always have custody issues and they are always the result of one or both parties having a personality disorder. The courts penalize the victims of the disordered individual, and press the "friendly" parent to relinquish rights in order to stop years of litigation that will lead to bankruptcy and loss of custody. This book is dangerous if accepted without a thorough understanding of coercive control, covert narcissistic abuse, and domestic abuse. Do not believe the authors untrue claim that abused children never align with the protective parent - if the child feels they are safer with the abused parent and they are old enough to voice that opinion, the courts should never discount the child's voice. Lastly, family courts rarely consider the family's history of documented abuse when issuing custody orders, and the victim is often punished for mentioning the history of abuse! The victim may not introduce this evidence until trial, which most victims cannot afford to endure. Family courts need to be educated by professionals who understand the dynamics of domestic abuse, and not by biased professionals who lack understanding of victims behavior, apparent disability (PTSD, people !), and the dynamics of coercive control. Stop penalizing victims and rewarding abusive and controlling parents. This book must be written by a father's rights advocate, as it promotes the very outdated, harmful, and untrue claims those groups have used when supplying the courts with training materials.

Dr. Childress should be commended for his epic works on this topic. He writes about children being turned against another parent in a high conflict divorce (or even after the divorce is over-because often problems remain). It's important that legal professionals, parents and Guardian Ad Litems working with kids in a high conflict situation, understand that some parents (usually with personality disorders) make it their mission to destroy a child's bond with the other parent-known as a targeted parent.Sure, divorce can leave both parties with some residual anger. But in time, MOST people who have kids together get over it and realize its time to move on for the sake of the kids. Dr. Childress is writing about those who do not "move on". In fact, they refuse to let go of their anger (even if they wanted the divorce). The kids, in their minds, are property-not human beings who need both parents love and care. As a result, professionals need to understand this can cause life long problems for the children involved, as well as the targeted parent. The court system is ill equipped to understand this, but Dr Childress explains it within the framework of current psychological understanding. Get this for any professional involved in a high conflict situation. There is simply too much of a human cost involved to disregard this issue.

I wish I had had this handbook when I was fleeing my marriage thru the domestic violence shelter. Now, I share it with my friends and the professionals who helped me back then, so that they are even better-prepared to identify pathological parents who have conditioned their children to only feel and express views and ideas that match their own. I was fortunate in the help that I did find and we are permanently safe, thanks to a wise county and state. Many are not as lucky. This booklet could make the difference.Great things in the book - the dynamics are well-explained and documented. Judges might look at these well-documented studies.Things I would like to see more of - tools for the professional - what things should a person seeking to save children from a pathological parent, do? Also, the studies are great because a court might listen to those, but as a parent who is operating in darkness it would have been nice to have been given anecdotal and true stories especially of court and systems.Overall, a phenomenal resource in an otherwise empty field.

Bravo to this contemporary hero of resesrch and clinical psychology. Dr Childress is concurrently developing professional psychological methodology for assessing for pathogenic parenting. The US legal system needs updated with current scientific knowledge and best practices on the borderline personality and pathogenic parenting that has devastatingly hijacked millions of fit and loving parents; hijacking Constitutional and International Human Rights law regarding a targeted parent’’s right to raise and be with their children. Children suffer from this attachment pathology and we need to assess for it during the initial or preliminary phases of contested child custody hearings. Dr Childress is pioneering this monumental effort to ultimately legislate the science that is already peer-reviewed and chiseled into the DSM-5 into the legal system and into all professional standards.

Fantastic review and read

Yeah.. no. If you're already in this situation, this advice means nothing except the bare minimum your legal advisor has told you. Keep the change for your lawyer, who probably passed the bar with this as a textbook.People reading this are usually victims in this scenario - which is not the purpose of the text.. its expensive, but you need to research your state/provinces family law act. Everywhere is different. A diagnosis of a disorder means nothing in certain circumstances. Research your jurisdiction, laws vary vastly.

PERFECT !