Cracked Up to Be: A Novel

What can I say about the first novel from my favorite writer? Well, it certainly is something. Courtney Summers‘ intentions behind the character of Parker Fadley are one of many reasons why we all love her and I do believe that she’s one oft he best protagonists I ever got the pleasure to meet. As always, Courtney Summers masters the art of writing a character flawlessly without losing her amazing writing style, bringing Parker to life as a very real and breathing girl that you could easily meet out on the streets. The remnants of Parker Fadley are found in every other character she ever wrote, but just as the rest oft hem she’s very unique.One of my favorite things about Courtney Summers’ writing is that she never ceases to disappoint me when it comes to her girls. Unlike other writers each of her protagonists feels so different from the other but there’s always something we all can relate to. It’s no different with Parker, despite her very troubled character and bad decisions. I often sat there and shook my head, not necessarily condoning her actions but I understood why she was doing it and how her brain worked. I think Parker is a masterpiece of a protagonist who made the book amazing.However, I have to admit that the novel isn’t my favorite Courtney Summers work. As I said, Parker is amazing. But the story doesn’t really go anywhere. Now, I know that you can always find an reason for artistic choices and argue. You could say that the red thread doesn’t lead us to a climax and is supposed to represent the horrible everyday state Parker is caught in. The boredom, the guilt, the grey and mundane school days that don’t mean anything. But unlike This Is Not A Test I think Parker’s story really calls for a drive. In This Is Not A Test it made sense why so little was happening. Students trapped in a school during a zombie apocalypse and it was such a haunting contrast to how abruptly and violently the book ended.Summers drops many hints for the reader to put the bigger picture together. It’s not that hard and stirrs the interest, the curiousity to find out what the hell happened. But the pace seemed so off. In combination with nothing happening at all, even if there’s a tiny build-up when Evan finally re-surfaces – what’s also a big thing I didn’t like as it happened way too late in my opinion. The short summary oft he book let me believe this was going to be a big thing, an old enemy returning, you know. It also led me to anticipate the big reveal. The way the whole thing was set up made me come up with several theories of how Evan and Parker could be tied to each other and what the big secret may be that they were hiding. Like, what on earth could they have done that Parker doesn’t want anyone to know? What makes her wish that Evan never came back? But in the end… I was disappointed. I expected something… I don’t know, probably just more than I got. I liked my own ideas better what left me very unsatisfied. It also made me feel like Parker let me down in her resentment for Evan bc the way he turned out to be involved was nothing at all like what I was hoping for. It fell totally flat for me. There was no big, condemning thing.Nonetheless, I read the book in almost a whole day and only took a break bc at some point we all need to go to sleep. It was gripping, but for me it’s my least favorite Courtney Summers book so far. But it still had a flawlessly flawed and amazing protagonist.

So, last year I read my first book by Courtney Summers. It was SADIE, and I loved it sooooo much. Instantly, I knew I had to read more of Summers’s books—but you know what? I was apprehensive. I thought that no other book could possibly live up to the expectations I now had. Because SADIE was phenomenal.But with the ten-year anniversary of Summers’s debut novel, CRACKED UP TO BE, coming up, and it being reissued with a gorgeous new cover, I persuaded myself to buy a copy. I’m ashamed to say it still took me a while to get around to reading it. That is until yesterday arrived.I started CRACKED UP TO BE at 2pm, and by 8pm I’d finished it. It’s amazing. Simply amazing. I might even love it more than Sadie.It’s unusual for me to read a whole book in one sitting, and this just proves how good this book is.The tenth-anniversary addition includes a new introduction written by Summers, and I loved the insight she gives us to her characters. Although, when reading it, I hadn’t yet started the novel, I already knew I’d adore the protagonist, Parker, as Summer tells us she’s considered to be “unlikeable”—precisely because she has the qualities and characteristics that are celebrated in male characters.And, wow, I was not wrong about liking her. Parker is quite possibly the best protagonist I’ve read. Ever.Let’s just let that sink in for a moment.The best protagonist ever.Yep, that’s how good this book is.Parker is a troublemaker. She’s constantly in trouble at school. She’s dark and mysterious, she’s got a drink problem, and she’s harbouring a dark, dark secret that haunts her. Her behaviour is reckless and wild—but she’s also got a soft, vulnerable side. She cares deeply about others.She feels so real. So, so real. Her actions are totally understandable. She’s afraid to let others close to her, so she pushes them away. She’s not just a reckless character for the sake of being reckless.Just, wow. And even her narrative voice is amazing. It’s so unique.And the plot. It is soooo good. We’ve got a missing girl and a murder, and a girl struggling with what she’s seen, as well as many other characters who are all struggling as well—but in different ways.The other main characters—Jake, Chris, and Becky—are equally well written. So believable. Ah, I really can’t say enough good things about this book.It’s told in a dual timeline. We’ve got the present day action interspersed with flashbacks all pertaining to one night. The night that a girl went missing. The night that was the catalyst for everything bad that happened. The night that turned Parker from a high-achieving student into a girl who’s broken and haunted and trying to pretend she isn’t.Okay—spoilers ahead now, so skip this paragraph if you don’t want to know. When it was revealed that the missing girl Jessie was Parker’s best friend everything made so much sense. That’s when it all started to come together. And I couldn’t read quickly enough.*Content warning for rape, sexual assault, attempted suicide.*

Now if you're like me and read a lot of book blogs, you've probably seen this one up about...oh everywhere. All the reviews for it are amazing. It got me thinking, can it really be that good? Because sometimes when everyone else finds something so great, I get horrible disappointed with all the hype.When taking on how to write a story there are authors that show you the characters and those that tell you about them. This book definitely shows you, which made it all more real in a sense. I could picture this book like a movie playing in my head. See the characters for who they were, hear their voices, and all those other great things we as readers love. Out of the all the characters in the book I warm up to Parker easily...who really isn't exactly a warming character at first. Might be the sarcastic wit she holds that sucked me in. But she's got a secret and a major problem - only if everyone would just leave her the hell alone, she might finally be okay...or so she thinks.The fact is that no matter how much Parker tries to shove everyone away, they're still there. Even though Parker is...ahem sometimes....they all still care, which made me care. Immediately I had to know why and what happened to make her like this.The mystery behind this story is fantastic. There are little hints here and there, but not enough for me to really guess what it was. You will be hooked from the first chapter and unable to put it down. Unless you realize you have to be at work in four hours and have no clue what you just read in the last five pages because you're so tired. Then after you get off of work, you go straight home, hyped up on caffeine, and pick this book back up to finish it. Only to get to the end and realize how much it was worth it.I love reading debut novels and Courtney Summers has swept me away. I cannot wait to read more from her! Oh and my only complaint is that the story ended. So to answer my own question in the first part of this review: Yes, it's THAT good!

Great book that had me wanting to read more after every turn of the page.. Parker is such a great character that is truly suffering after a traumatic experience in her all to "have to be perfect life" .. No one understands why the captain of the cheerleading squad and straight A student suddenly drinks until she is blotto , even at school and has alienated herself from her boyfriend and what friends she has, even her parents are on her hit list..I love the piece by piece flashbacks of the night her life is turned upside down and how everything finally is pieced together ..

It takes a lot to write this kind of novel. I found myself crying over the main character as at one point in my life I felt the nothing she felt. Some won't understand the pain or heartache a person has to go through to make themselves feel nothing however this book is just it. The emotions, the characters and how it will make you feel when you read it is undoubtedly special. It takes a lot for a book to get the emotions bang on but this book has it. Beautifully written to the point you feel the hollow pain and guilt that Parker is feeling. I think it needs to be said that this book isn't about recovery it's about acceptance and the ugly parts that come before that. Most importantly it's about the real life and how ugly it can get - but how beautiful recovery and acceptance can be when we start to let people in.